Hello Kitty

Up until today, I never knew who ‘Hello Kitty’ was.  I still don’t know very much; I only read the first paragraph of her wikipedia page. I have seen her image on shirts, hats, shower curtains, backpacks, etc., like I have seen ‘Spongebob Squarepants’ and ‘Mickey Mouse’ on hats, t-shirts, etc., but I had this idea that ‘Spongebob Squarepants’ was a ‘real’ character (insofar as he seemed to have some sort of ‘existance’ as a fictional cartoon character outside of being a reason to sell merchandise, and, one might argue, the popularity of the cartoon helped sell the merchandise). As far as I could tell, there was no cartoon behind ‘Hello Kitty.’ ‘Hello Kitty’ seems to have existed in order to sell stuff first, and THEN they made the cartoons, comic books and video games.  Which seems pretty backwards but maybe it’s just post-postmodernity in action.

Didja know you can get a ‘Hello Kitty’ AK?  They also make a Hello Kitty AR15.

8 Comments on “Hello Kitty”

  1. Anita says:

    You're correct, Hello Kitty was made just to sell stuff. Sanrio wanted to sell more things like purses and toys so they commissioned an artist to create a cartoon to put on merchandise.

  2. Chris Creel says:

    Hello Kitty on a gun, that's just wrong, wrong, wrong!

  3. Stephan Poag says:

    Chris Creel wrote, Hello Kitty on a gun, that's just wrong, wrong, wrong!

    Wrong as in “How could they defile that darling little cartoon cat by putting a cartoon cat on it?” or wrong as in “How could they ruin that gun by painting it pink?”

    I could do without the knitted sleeve or the cat sticker on the magazine or the engraving on the front furniture, but I think the purple finish on the steel looks pretty sweet — I wonder how well it would hold up — is it just nail polish that is going to cook off the barrel and make an ungodly chemical stench as I am mowing my way through hordes of zombies? If so, no thanks. But if it's some kind of anodized coating or whatever, well, what other colors do you have?
    I'd like to get several with different colors for different occassions.

  4. Akiyama says:

    Is it possible that you don't realise this is a joke? Of course Hello Kitty would never be on a gun. How could she be – she's a character aimed at little kids!

    Sometimes, there are things on the internet that aren't true!

    I've always thought it weird too, that Hello Kitty existed as a fully fleshed out character, long before she was in cartoons, purely for merchandising purposes.

  5. Stephan Poag says:

    Sometimes, there are things on the internet that aren't true!
    Say it aint so! I've already placed my order — we'll see who is laughing when I show up at the range with my 'Hello Kitty' AK!

  6. Chris Creel says:

    I imagined that it was a toy gun, even a toy gun should not have the Hello Kitty image on it. ::end tangent::

  7. Stephan Poag says:

    I was disappointed to learn that the special “Breast Cancer Awareness” edition Bersa .380 was no longer available. It came in a pink case with wrist band, 2 magazines and interchangeable grips (pink or black).
    The Walther p-22 “Hope” edition gun (a p22 semi auto with pink slide) is no longer being produced, but the fine folks at DGS may be able to still fill your order from existing stock; call for availability! http://www.discountgunsales.com/walther-p-22-hope-edition-34-pr-5575.html
    A portion of the proceeds of each sale go to help breast cancer research and awareness, so think on that when you go to buy your next weapon.

  8. Malcadon says:

    I have been well aware of the odd Hello Kitty products for some time now through a site called Hello Kitty Hell (www.kittyhell.com/). They note a number of official Hello Kitty products for females; including tampons, sanitation pads, vibrators (called “personal massager”) and sound-boxes that keeps overly modest Japanese form over-flushing to mask the sound of them shitting (I shit you not, this is real!). They also include stuff that are not that official; weapons, tattoos, costumes, sex-toys/paraphernalia and so on. I think this is all fucking funny!

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